Tips: Drive Thru Edition

After starting the battle of Drive thru's recently, I thought I would take the time to give my loyal readers some tips to get the most out of their drive thru experience. Since I have been on the inside, I feel as though I've been holding out on everyone. Seau.

Okay, so first things first...

If you're like me, you need to have fresh fries. Not only fresh, but froosh. McDonald's is notorious for having the best fries, yet also notorious for have the worst fries if they're not fresh.

Best thing to do to ensure the freshest fries is:

a) if you go when it's not busy and you're the only car/person ordering, ask for fries without salt. This will ensure that they will make you a fresh batch, then you can just salt them yourself. This works best when you go inside, but also can work in drive thru.

b) if its busy, you're in luck. The busiest times are the best to ensure the frooshest fries, cuz they have to replenish amply. Don't be scurred of that intimidating line...it's worth the wait.

c) just straight up ask for fresh fries, and tell them you don't mind waiting. This way they are not impartial to spitting in your food (just kidding, this never happens). As long as you're honest, the sont working there can't hate- they can only appreciate.

These days it seems as though sauce is a frigging commodity. Long gone are the days of getting a 20- piece nugget with 20 sauces, yes one for each nugget. For 12 cents there's no way I'm paying to have BBQ with my fries. How do I get free sauce you ask? Easy:

Order sauce with your meal at the end, like when they ask you for any ketchups, politely mention what sauce you'd like. This way EVEN if you didn't order nuggets, they should hook up a sauce. Now in the event that they are being toite- ask to see a manager. I know, everyone hates to be a bitch, but it's your right to have sauce. Just tell them in the nicest way "WTF?" 12 cents per sauce equals almost 0.3 cents per dip...this is ridiculous!

Note- if you're a woman, you shouldn't have any problems getting free sauce, but guys- you probably will. Seau boys, that's just the way of the world.

Ever get that drink that just doesn't stop leaking? I know we've all got the "dribbler", that seems like one innocent drop until you hit the brakes and you've got coke-age all over your dash. Keep an eye on the cup when they pass it to you....any leakage signals desperately for a new lid. You must ask for a new lid otherwise you're in trouble.

We all have a 'friend' (this may even be you) who is never satisfied with the way Fast Food places make their burgers...sometimes they just don't recognize the proper needs of the customer. If you're one of those ppl who always make special requests on the burger- (I once had a friend who always got his Big Mac with no onions), power to you! By making that special request, you are secretly enabling yourself to a fresh burger. When I used to work at Mc'D's oh so long ago...we utilized the "BIN" system. What is? you ask... The bin was simply a buffer of burgers for when it got super busy...We would have a float of a few of the most popular burgers so that we could just pump them out without having to wait for each individual order. Those days are long gone, thank God...As I'm sure we've all received that age-old McChicken that was made many, many hours ago.

So now Mc'D's always makes their burgers to order...or so they say. If someone changes their order, they do not throw away the extra burger- heaven forbid. They just leave it and assume someone will order it soon enough.

What I'm getting at is simple...Make your burger a special order and it will guarantee that it will actually be made right at that moment. Now this doesn't ensure that your chicken was fried right at that moment, but now we're just pushing it. In a perfect world, or say an A&W world, everything, and I mean everything is made to order.

Lastly, always check your bag before you pulle away from the window. There's nothing worse than getting home and realizing your fries are missing or you have no blood-clot straw. Even if there's a line, COTL of your bag and perform a contents check:

1- straw, napkin, sauce
2- correct burger/sammich
3- unspilled fries- 'fry check'- have one fry before you drive away...if its even smei-cold, send it back

Remember- no one likes working at any fast-food drive thru, and for the most part the people who do are young, high, and just don't give a fuck. So always try and make a joke or two, cuz even if they are krusty, and you make them smile, they'll think twice about giving you that burger that's been sitting in the bin for ages, or waiting that extra 3 seconds for the fresh one on it's way.


I hope these tips will enable you a better Drive-thru experience next time you find yourself meandering into the realm of fast food.

One last thing:
If you feel the service you received was bushy or the fries you got were cold- don't be afraid to voice your opinion. "The customer is always right" mentality really does come into effect in the Fast Food World. Don't be shy, speak to a manager, and I guarantee you'll be hooked up...

Tell them Alz sent you.